What are the best Miniclip games ever? Well, I’m glad you asked…
Honestly, the hardest part about making this top 5 of the best Miniclip games list was not making it a top 10 list. They say 70% of the internet is porn – well, until I found that out, the only website I knew was miniclip.com.
It actually makes me feel sick to think of the hours I spent playing Miniclip games during my childhood. If I spent all those hours in my room doing something productive, I could’ve solved world hunger, cured cancer AND learned how to use chopsticks.
Now I know Miniclip is a bit more upmarket and into smartphone games and all that jazz these days, but I’m throwing it back to a simpler time. These are the top 5 best Miniclip games we played while procrastinating our year 4 maths homework.
5) Bug on a Wire
Seriously, they should try getting heroin addicts hooked on Bug on a Wire instead. Do you know how hard it was to continue writing this article and not immediately stop to play this game? If you stop reading right now and start playing I won’t even be upset! No wait, I will be. Please come back. There are four more to go!
Simple, ingenious and painfully addictive with a killer soundtrack to boot, this game is an all-time classic.
4) Base Jumping
It’s sixth period, roughly 3pm and you’ve mentally checked out for the day two hours ago. What do you do? You play base jumping of course. A game of reaction time, skill and just the right amount of luck that would have everyone in the room huddled around your computer on the final jump vs The King.
I’ll never forgive the animated orange ball, Kilamanjaro for the many times he made my character eject too late and explode on impact. R.I.P. Barry Jumpfries.
3) Heli Attack 3
Holy shit I loveeeeeed this game. I mean like I had to be physically dragged away from my computer on more than one occasion type of love.
Not only is this one of the most fun, exhilarating and intense games I’ve ever played to this day, but it was even more fun with two players! I shudder to think of the amount of lunchtimes I spent with my best mate on the mouse shooting and me on the keys moving (I’m the evasive one, he had the deadeye) running away from those helicopter bullets.
Motherload or MotherGOAT? Amirite! Na it was definitely called Motherload, I checked, sorry for the confusion.
Who would have ever thought being an imaginary machine on a made up planet digging for fake gems could be so fun! Nowadays, I spend my entire life searching for the rush I used to get when I had just enough gas to get back up to the surface and refuel. What a thrill!
Fun fact, I’m pretty sure they actually based the design of the Mars Rover on the Motherload robot (don’t quote me on that).
1) Bubble Trouble
The game that made Miniclip. There have been plenty of spinoffs/sequels since but the original is still by far the best. Please God in my next life let me come back as the demon that shoots bubbles falling from the sky at various paces and sizes.
My fondest memory of junior/middle/high school is still 25 kids sitting in a computer lab racing to get to that elusive endless Level 17. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, firstly, we can never be friends. I’m sorry, I don’t make the rules, I just enforce them. Secondly, do yourself a favour and check this out right now
I’m sure most of you reading this are punching holes through your computer or screaming at your phone because I missed out on what you think are the best Miniclip games. Well, feel free to hit me up in the comments to tell me how stupid I am and give me some new Miniclip game suggestions!